Anxiety
Author: Saidicam29
Characters: Sa, Am, and others
Rating: G

Disclaimer: Star Trek is owned by Paramount.or Viacom.I can't recall.  Not me, either way.

Summary: As the title suggests, the inner thoughts and feelings on an important day.

Note: T'Sia mentioned in her earlier story that we're sort of working on writing short stories, rather than lengthy ones, and for this one I was to write a short story in second person.  I'm not thrilled with this one, or with writing in second person at all, but this is the result.

Thanks, as always, to Selek for betaing.

Anxiety

You take a deep breath, slowing releasing it as you square your shoulders and straighten to your fullest height, hoping to exude the calm and confidence you don't feel.  Your appearance is immaculate – you know this because you spent hours selecting just the right clothes and meticulously performing your grooming then checking and rechecking the outcome until you were assured nothing seemed out of place.

As you look out upon the room full of people you feel the tightening in your gut again, the flutter of your heart doubling its pace and you swallow hard against the lump forming in your throat.  They are all waiting for you, to see you, to hear your words.  Nothing must go wrong, not today.  This is a monumental day, not just for you, but also history itself.

The time has come.  With a practiced pace you enter the room and walk towards the podium.  Your presence attracts the attention of many, tidings of well wishes from some.  These go unacknowledged as you remain focused on your destination, silently rehearsing your words as you've done every night for the past week.

Ahead of you stands Judge Baumann, ready to perform the ceremony, and standing before her, there he is.  The mere sight of him calms you, and with a proud lift of your chin you stride the rest of the way to take your place beside him.  When you approach the judge speaks to you, and you nod briefly although you didn't hear a word she said over the whirl of thoughts racing through your mind.  She speaks aloud, calling the crowd to order to begin the proceedings.  You stand before her, perfectly still, waiting for your part, impatient to get this over with, yet wanting to savour every moment.

Lost in your own thoughts, you suddenly become aware of a commotion from the rear of the room and turn to look.  Almost as one, the crowd turns as well, many standing to get a better look at the spectacle.  Your eyes scan the room.  Their excited murmurs are too hushed for you to discern the words, and your perusal fails to enlighten you to their meaning.  Then you see her, standing in the back of the room, and while not unexpected, her arrival causes all your anxieties to return.  She hesitates, looking around the room nervously, then she finds you, and with a look of fierce determination, she enters the room.  Every step that brings her closer tightens the cage around your chest, and you fear you will lose consciousness by the time she reaches you.

You glance to your left, and see he also watches her.  Sensing your stare, his eyes meet yours, but his face remains impassive, his thoughts blind to you.  Looking back, you see her course has remained true, her path leading directly to you.  You catch her gaze, staring hard into her eyes, desperate to know what's in her mind.  She stops before you, her eyes roam over your length, and although illogical your heart stops in fear of her reaction. Does she disapprove?

Then she smiles, and like a wave breaking upon the shore all your doubts and worries come crashing down.  A warmth spreads throughout your body, and a sense of elation fills your mind.  She takes your left arm, slipping her right arm through it, and turns you both so your backs are to the crowd, giving your attention to the judge.  You feel her squeeze your arm, and when you look at her, she is still smiling.  She leans closer, and you bend a little to hear her.

"I can't believe how calm you are.  I'm so nervous I can't stop shaking!"

You place your right hand over hers, squeezing it reassuringly.  "Of course," you say with complete equanimity, "I am Vulcan."

"Ladies and gentlemen," the judge begins.  "We are here today to witness the union between Ambassador Sarek, of Vulcan, and Amanda Grayson, of Earth."

As the judge continues, you look back to your right where Soran still stands beside you, and he nods his approval.


The End.